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Self Love in Our Challenging Global Times
Need some anxiety relief and to reconnect with your inner peace at this challenging time?
You are not alone. I am here to support you anyway I can. Check out my article below to learn some key practices that help you to reduce anxiety and practice self-love in this challenging time.
#1 Affirm the Present Moment:
It’s OK to feel whatever you are feeling. This is especially important to remember right now and to affirm this. Anxiety stems from chronic thinking of thoughts about the future, writes Rick Hanson in his book, Buddha’s Brain: The Practical Neuroscience of Happiness, Love, and Wisdom. The way to break patterns of anxiety is to affirm the present moment. Even just taking a deep breath into your belly for a quick moment helps to break the cycle. You may also think about something you are grateful for in this moment or something beautiful around you right now. You may also use these affirmations, “In this moment, I am safe.” “In this moment, I am healthy.” “In this moment, I have shelter.” When you sync these affirmations with a breath practice (like the one mentioned right below), this practice will be even more effective! Continue to use these affirmations and others that encourage a sense of calm, safety and gratitude. Remember, stress is scientifically proven to decrease immune function so the more you can break stress cycles, the more you will improve your immunity.
#2 Develop a Pranayama (Breathing) Practice:
I cannot tell you just how helpful my Pranayama (Breathing) Practice has been as of late. I remembered the power of breath after re-reading Patanjali’s Yoga Sutras (written in 400 CE, cornerstone of yoga today). Reading these Sutras gave me comfort and reminded me of the powerful word Pranayama, which is Sanskrit for life-force. The ancient yogis believed that our breath was key to lengthening our life-force and in fact, several scientific studies show how pranayama is effective for treating stress disorders and increasing concentration.
Feeling like my mind was scattered, I longed for concentration and to come back to the light within. So I sat down to meditate on my breath. I counted my inhales 1-2-3-4, briefly holding at the top and exhales 4-3-2-1. Afterward, I felt so much more in touch with myself. I tapped into a peace and security within myself I was missing. I highly recommend the effective “Counting Your Breath” practice above. If you’d like some guidance, I have guided meditations like this and others on my Self Love Living Online Yoga and Meditation Studio with 10 guided meditations, 16 mini yoga practices, and lectures on the power of breath and mindfulness! Info to sign-up is at the bottom of this article.
#3 Do Small Activities to Cultivate positivity & Hope
As part of the women’s circle I am a part of, our facilitator asked us to write down:
1) 3 things we are proud of…
2) 3 things we are grateful for…
3) 3 things that we desire…
I noticed that before doing this, I was in a negative mood and thinking fearful thoughts about lacking money in the future. Through doing this small activity of writing down these 3 things I am proud of, grateful for, and what I desire, I broke my cycle of fear and anxiety. As a result, I felt more uplifted and happy.
I encourage you to do this exercise and notice how you feel afterward. Positive prompts like these break our stress cycles and fill us with some hope and happiness.
#4 Create a Routine
For the first week or two of the stay at home order, this new normal was a lot for me to get used to. I was sleeping in a ton and looking at the news 5X or more per day. This did not do well for my mental health. What helped me feel better and more productive was to create a routine. I made a to-do list with specific work and self-care tasks. With having more of a routine, I felt much more productive and healthy. Reflect upon what makes you feel cared for, nourished, and mentally happy and write them down. Commit to adding some of these things into your life daily and perhaps even make a schedule for yourself to make sure that you do them at specific times.
#5 Exercise:
Moderate intensity exercise is scientifically proven to improve your immune system. Also in this time of social distance, it’s important to keep our spirits up. Exercise releases feel good hormones that make us happier. Please remember to exercise in this time where we need strong health and immunity. If you feel more comfortable exercising inside, do indoor activities. I teach a couple live-streamed restorative classes on Yogaworks this month on Wednesday/Thursday evenings and there are many other teachers with wonderful yoga and other work-out offerings. You may access these classes at www.yogaworks.com. And again, remember to check out my link below for access to my Self-Love Living Online Yoga and Meditation Studio with a collection of recorded yoga classes and meditations.
#6 Rest:
A former client of mine was diagnosed with Co-Vid19. It took her weeks to get better but she finally overcame it. When I asked her what helped her get better and stay calm, she responded through text with one word, “rest.” Not only is resting important to remember when you are sick, but it’s very important for preventative wellness. It’s scientifically proven that people who don’t get enough sleep or good quality sleep are more likely to catch a virus. This is because infection fighting antibodies and cells reduce when you don’t get enough sleep. Adults need 7-8 hours of sleep per night to bolster their immune systems! Make sure you take this time to get good quality rest. (Dr. Eric J. Olson M.D. https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/insomnia/expert-answers/lack-of-sleep/faq-20057757)
#7 Laugh:
They say that laughter is the best medicine. Research shows it make you happier, lowers blood pressure, reduces stress, improves heart health, boosts immune function, and more! When facing such a challenging time, laughter is a powerful coping tool. Look at pictures of cute cats, watch funny shows, call up a friend who makes you laugh, see the humor in little moments, do what you need to laugh!
My partner teaches laughter yoga and improv which is keeping the spirits up of many! Check out his Meet-up group, The Cambridge Improv Incubator, for info on his Improv Zoom Calls (for all levels total beginners to advanced) and Laughter Yoga Zoom calls!
#8 Good Hygiene:
It goes without saying that washing our hands and frequently touched surfaces are crucial in keeping ourselves and others safe. However beyond this, now is a perfect time to go beyond through Ayurvedic practices that keep our bodies in tip-top shape. Ayurveda is the sister science of yoga invented thousands of years ago. These age old Ayurvedic practices help detoxify our whole system! Here are a list of practices you may try below for optimal health.
Ayurvedic Physical Health and Energy Practices:
Abhyanga: This practice is putting oil over your body. The word “Abhyanga” in Sanskrit means “self-love.” The practice of oil self-massage is said to The practice of oil self-massage quiet the nervous system, rejuvenate the skin and tissues, promote healthy circulation of lymph, and remove stagnation
Neti-pot: Using a neti-pot is the practice of flushing your sinuses with a salt-water solution. Is said to be particularly helpful for nasal allergies, sinus issues, and colds but helpful all around for sinus health.
Oil-pull: Swishing with coconut or sesame oil for 2-20 minutes. It is said to help detoxify the mouth, whiten teeth, and absorb impurities.
Tongue scrape: Using a tongue scraper (or for years I used a spoon and it worked alright before I finally bought a tongue scraper) in the morning, scrape the coating off of your tongue. It is said to eliminate bacteria and toxins, help you monitor how your diet is affecting your system (if there’s a lot of coating, it is said to be more toxins and bacteria).
Dry-Brushing: A practice for the winter season, this is helpful for stimulating the nervous system, unclogging pores, increase blood circulation, and promote lymph flow/drainage. Brushing your skin.
Warm Water and Lemon in the Morning: Drinking this first thing in the morning is said to stimulate digestion, hydrate, and promote elimination.
#9 Help Others:
“When you feel helpless, help someone.”
-Aung San Suu Kyi
If you feel caught up in worrying, think about what you can do to help someone else in this time. There are so many ways to support, even if it’s checking in on a friend and neighbor. When we focus on others, it gets us out of our own heads. Research shows that the most confident people are actually more focused on others rather than themselves. How might you use your skills, passions, and resources at this time to help another? The answer may surprise you. All acts of kindness—even the really itty bitty tiny ones—bring more light and happiness into the world.
#10 Get support:
Social distance doesn’t mean social isolation. In fact, what we may need now more than ever is social connection. Our communities bring us hope and a reminder that we are not alone. Whether it’s an online community that brings you joy, connecting with friends through phone or video, or through email, seek out connection. It’s an essential component of human happiness!
Furthermore, it’s more than OK to reach out for support. It is normal to be experiencing some intense feelings and emotions coming up at this time. I’ve been working with coaching clients through Zoom technology and Face-time on how to manage these emotions, organize their time, and go inward to do deep self-love work. Some clients look at this as the perfect time to go within, face their fears, and cultivate the self-love they need to move forward in their personal and professional lives with greater clarity and confidence.
Does this sound like you?
Right now I offer free initial 25 minute Tame Your Inner-Critic consultations for clients who want to learn The 5 Keys to Tame Your Inner Critic I use in my personalized coaching program and how these tools are essential to transform their life and achieve their personal and/or professional goals. If you are interested, please book below!
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10 Keys to Unblock Your Heart (& Live with Greater Joy and Love!)
Happiest February! This month is all about the heart. When we live from our heart, we experience deep joy and love and attract it to us more freely. Our heart chakra, in the middle of our chest, is our energetic center for love, joy, gratitude, and compassion. The key to living a joyful and love-filled life is to release what blocks us from opening our heart center. Issues, such as self-criticism, a feeling of unworthiness, holding grudges, and unresolved grief, are indicators that we have a blocked or deficient heart chakra.
Want to learn more about releasing blocks to your heart chakra and living life more freely with joy and love? Below, learn 10 keys to unblock your heart and open to greater joy and love this month <3
#1 Forgive yourself:
We all make mistakes. It’s only human. Holding onto regret and ruminating on past mistakes only blocks our capacity for joy and love. Take time to think about a mistake that you need to forgive yourself for. Recognize that you are not alone. In fact, repeat this mantra, “I am not alone,” while taking deep breaths with one of your hands on your heart chakra (center of your chest). We often think we are alone in our faults and imperfections when it is something that greatly connects us in our common humanity. Give yourself permission to be human and forgive yourself.
#2 Forgive that person who hurt you:
Even if it’s the worst thing in the world that someone did to you, when you continue to hold onto it, it only hurts you. This quote,“holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die” by an unknown author explains it perfectly. Don’t continue to hurt yourself over someone who hurt you. Learn to forgive them and let their hold over you gone for good.
#3 Treat Yourself kindly:
Along the same line as forgive yourself, take it further. Speak to yourself as if you were speaking to a small child or a good friend you greatly respect. Compelling research by self-compassion expert Kristin Neff states that those who experience greater self-compassion toward their mistakes and imperfections experience greater well-being than those who constantly judge themselves. It’s been shown that they even experience less episodes of anxiety and depression. Turn your inner-critic into your inner-nurturer and experience greater well-being.
#4 Speak and Act with COURage:
The word “cour” actually means “heart.” Therefore, to have courage literally means to live with heart. Living with courage is not easy because it means that we have to embrace vulnerability, which is difficult for most of us. Being vulnerable means that we risk rejection, disapproval, and failure.“Vulnerability is not winning or losing; it’s having the courage to show up and be seen when we have no control over the outcome” says Brene Brown, best selling author and expert on courage and vulnerability. While hiding your most courageous self may keep you “safe,” it truly holds you back from experiencing true joy, happiness, and love.
#5 Write an I Trust List:
Adapted from bestselling author and inspirational speaker, Danielle Laporte, an “I Trust list” is a great way to open our heart chakra. Through writing an “I Trust List,” we reinforce mental thinking patterns of trust and faith and can better rewrite ruminating mental spirals of self-doubt. Here’s how to write one: at the top of a blank page, simply write, “I Trust" and then list everything you can. Here’s an example: I Trust: 1) that my partner loves me. 2) that my mother loves me. 3) that I will end up exactly where I am meant to be. 4) that the sun will shine tomorrow. 5) that I will be ok. Continue for as long as you’d like and when you’re finished, feel for effects.
#6 Do Something (or aLot of Things!) to Bring You Joy:
Experiencing joy is incredibly healthy for our heart chakra. In addition, many Law of Attraction believers say that when we do more of what brings us joy, we naturally attract our deepest desires to us. Whether you believe in the Law of Attraction or not, experiencing the emotion of joy releases all sorts of endorphins helpful for a healthy brain and body. What makes you smile, feel free and have fun? Go do that!
#7 Release Grief:
When we hold onto grief, we cause energetic and emotional blocks. In fact, the Latin origin of the word “emotion” literally means “energy in motion.” We must let the energy of grief move for physical, mental, and emotional health. Engage in appropriate channels for grief release by doing what works for you. For instance, you can speak to a professional or a trusted friend. Don’t be afraid to cry it out or find a same space to howl and sob.
#8 Create Heart Boundaries:
Living with a healthy heart chakra does not mean that we spew out our heart to everyone. We need to practice self-care in the process. We need to be thoughtful, stand in our values, and choose our battles worthy of our time and energy. Be intentional and, especially with your most tender feelings, always be sure to share them with someone you trust.
#9 Practice Gratitude:
Gratitude is the open door to abundance and it certainly is key to heart chakra opening. List your top 5 gratitudes from each day in the evening or simply write about what you’re grateful for as a free-write. Get up each day and find some gratitude for having woken up, for the day to begin a new, and for whatever you have planned that day. Any chance you get, be grateful.
#10 Practice Compassion for Others:
A sure way to get out of our own misery is to recognizing that we have the power to help someone else. “Help someone and you will help yourself” says spiritual teacher and best-selling author Gabrielle Bernstein. Pick up the phone and call someone who might need it, go volunteer, or just do some very simple and small to make someone smile. Get out of your own way and help others in whatever way you can!
In the Boston area and need some more help in healing and opening your heart chakra? I have a few spots for Reiki healing sessions with 10% off through the month of February.
Email me to book.
7 Ways to Write Your Way to More Meaningful and Intentional This New Year
Do you want to be more intentional and have greater meaning in your life this New Year?
As I reflect on the great Martin Luther King, I’m reminded of the importance to serve others and how good it makes us feel to be of service. When we take time to prioritize what’s important and let go of what’s last on our list, we're much more intentional and have more presence for the people and the things that truly matter in our lives. I have put together a blog to help you below.
#1: Write it all Down:
Journaling helps people let their overwhelming thoughts down on paper and out of their head. Many clients I work with have said that once they journal, they feel so much lighter afterward. I’ve had a journaling practice since I was 9 years old and I can concur it helps me feel so much lighter and liberated. I highly suggest doing a free-writing practice. Free-writing is when you just keep writing your thoughts no matter how stupid or silly you may think they are and resist the desire to edit anything. Imagine dumping it out all onto the paper!
#2 Glean Your Free-write:
When you’ve finished your free-write from above, go back and underline or circle what seems most important for you. You can have fun with it by highlighting in different colors what seems like a priority or what seems like a surprising insight to you. Often when I’ve done this, I’ve highlighted certain phrases that feel like my authentic self or some empowering phrase that’s important for me to remember. Through doing this, you may have a lot more clarity on your thought processes and by going through your free-write with an analytical eye, you’ll have more information on what you truly want and need to make them into goals.
#4: Make Your Goal(s) Specific:
One of the reasons we don’t achieve our goals is because we make them too lofty and they can seem overwhelming when put into action. Therefore, write down your goal and make it as specific as possible. The more specific you can make it, research shows the closer you will get to achieving it.
#3: Create a Categorized Priority List:
One of my favorite ways to create a priority list is to make categories. You have authority over which categories you want to work on most. The categories I use are “Self-Care” “Finances” and “Business” at the moment because these are the categories I need to work on most. By categorizing the list, it creates a more organized way to look at what you need to do. Then create very specific action steps under each category. Before I began categorizing my to-do list, I would without noticing it skip my action steps on finances (because it’s my least preferred thing to do). But since I make it its own category, I make it a point to achieve one of the specific action step items on my “Finances” category list once a week.
#5: Do The Doubler:
The Doubler is a writing exercise by Shawn Anchor, author of The Happiness Advantage. Each day in the evening take time to for 2 minutes about what brought you the most meaning that day. You may be surprised by what you wrote. By doing this you will come to notice what brings you a true feeling of meaning in your life. The first step to bring more meaning into your life is to notice what brings you meaning and the more you notice, the more you will be able to seek out and plan for more moments of meaning in the future!
#6: Gratitude Journaling:
Research shows it that gratitude just works. You may write down the top 5 gratitudes from your day or just do a gratitude free-write. When things are going tough, you can always be reminded that it could be worse when you do a gratitude practice.
#7 Ask yourself-What Can I Give?
Research shows that the most truly confident people are ones who focus more on others than on themselves. When over-focus on ourselves, we aren’t living our happiest life because we are not feeling like we are of service. Everyday ask yourself “How can I give?” or “How can I be of service?” The more you feel like you’re being of service, the more connected you feel to yourself and the the greater collective. And not to mention, the more you will make an impact in the world!
5 Practices to Feel Better & Brighter This Holiday Season
Are you feeling overwhelmed with emotion this late fall?
Has it been challenging to keep your spirits up as the weather gets darker?
The holidays can bring up a lot of unease, stress, and sadness for many. Please know that you are not alone. I have put together an actionable list to help you keep your spirits up and rekindle your own inner-light throughout the darkness.
Honoring and Accepting Yourself Journaling Exercise:
A sure way to feel worse is to judge ourselves for how we’re feeling. The first step to feeling better is to hold space for the challenging emotions we face. Take time to journal and write what you are feeling. At the end of the journaling entry, write this mantra, “Even though I am feeling _________________(insert whatever you are feeling: angry, sad, grieving, frustrated, lonely, etc.) I completely love and accept myself.” This step is crucial to feeling better. Please note that this HAS to feel authentic to you. If it doesn’t feel authentic, write this instead, “Even though I am feeling ___________________, I am working on loving and accepting myself.”
Self-Care Inventory:
When we feel more emotional, our self-care routine tends to get off-track. This creates a vicious cycle because when self-care goes out of the window, we feel worse. Take inventory of your self-care routine. Write down the following categories: Physical, Mental, Emotional, Spiritual, and Financial. Rate each category from 1-10 (1 being the worst and 10 being the best). Write about what’s going well for each category and what needs improvement. Then, write 1-3 self-care actions you can take in each category to improve your self-care and get the support you need.
Gratitude Practice:
You may not have control over the circumstances of your life but you DO have control of where you focus your attention. For instance, maybe you don’t yet have the house to put the gorgeous Christmas tree, or you’re grieving the loss of a loved one, or you really hoped to be with a partner but you aren’t yet. Gratitude is crucial in feeling better and refocusing on what we do have rather than what we don’t. Focus on what you are grateful for through listing specific moments you are grateful for at the end of each day.
Hygge Practice:
Hygge is a Danish tradition that means to take comfort in soothing things. Since it’s so dark in Denmark this time of year, people practice Hygge to feel cozy and warm. Even doctors recommend drinking tea! What makes you feel cozy this time of year? List a bunch of ways to feel cozy and commit to doing at least 2.
Acts of Kindness:
One of the best ways to get out of our head is to focus on others. Since it is the season of giving, how can you give from your heart? What brings you meaning and how can you deliver that more to others? In what ways can you do small acts of kindness? Here are some small (but so big and effective) examples: writing a letter of appreciation to someone, calling a friend and sharing kind words, volunteering at the nearest soup kitchen or shelter nearby, making a creative project for someone, running an errand or doing an act of service for someone who needs help.
These 5 practices can help you to feel better and tame your inner critic this time of year. Always remember to get support if you need it.
What would it be like to have someone to support you through the holidays to help you feel better? I have limited spots available in my Tame Your Inner Critic Life-Coaching Program.
Schedule Your Complementary 20 minute Tame Your Inner Critic Life-Coaching call by emailing me.
Boost Your Mood With This Powerful Nature Visualization
Enjoy Nature...Even on Dark and Dreary Days. When the weather is dark, cold, and dreary, it can seem like it won't ever end. Studies have shown that visualization to be a very powerful tool that produces positive emotions which cascade in positive hormones to rebuild neural pathways that make for an increased ability to experience pleasure. The more we are able to experience pleasure, the happier we feel. Enjoy my nature visualization on my blog. You'll feel more connected to nature around you. It's one of my favorites to feel the warmth of the sun on my skin -- even when it's so cold outside. It may sound silly but this stuff seriously works!
Build Self-Confidence With This Visualization!
Hey! Happy Valentine’s Day! I hope you know that you are a beautiful being worthy of love, care, and affection. Love yourself the way that you deserve to be loved. Enjoy one of my favorite visualizations to help build confidence and shine bright like the sun! It focuses on 3rd chakra energy—center for will-power and action! Step into your power!
3 Essential Tips to Feel More Grounded and Balanced This Fall!
Are you feeling all over the place and ungrounded these days? There's a reason for that! According to Ayurvedic Philosophy, the Vata time of year (the fall) can start making us feel this way. It's a time where we are transitioning into winter. Vata is ruled by the wind element. Vata in excess can make you feel like you're being blown all over the place (physically, mentally, and emotionally!)
3 Essential Tips to Feel More Balanced, Calm and Grounded This Fall:
Eat cooked and oilier foods-Since vata is cool, you'll want to eat warming foods. Be sure to cook most of your food. Dry food can also cause aggravation so use nourishing oils such as ghee or olive oil in your cooking. Favor foods with sweet, sour, and salty tastes.
Slow down your workout: Vata can easily get out of balance by fast and high intensity exercise routines. For more balance, consider slow, gentle, and strengthening exercises. Walking, hiking, swimming, biking, yoga, and tai chi can be good choices given they're not too intense. Your yoga routine should focus on stability and grounding postures.
Do Less! Less is more in the vata season. Multi-tasking will be sure to aggravate. Balancing vata is all about doing less and grounding yourself in some activities that involve staying put. Think about activities that make you feel cozy too such as taking a bath, reading a book or journaling.
This article here goes much more in detail-check it out here! https://www.banyanbotanicals.com/info/ayurvedic-living/living-ayurveda/seasonal-guides/autumn-guide/
Non-Reactiveness Through Daily Meditation Practice
Mindfulness, especially a daily meditation practice, helps to manage anxiety and cultivate non-reactiveness. Through non-reactiveness, we are able to notice our thoughts without jumping in to engage them right away. We cultivate the ability to change the stories we tell ourselves on repeat. When we rewrite those stories, we rewrite our perspective which changes our outlook and our life.